meet squelch's officers

(l to r: Greg Shows, vocals, piano; Brian Miller, guitars, b.vocals; Jason English, bass, b.vocals; Chris Smith, drummist)

The Squelch's spiel

Upon seeing Squelch's, you will feel like you have just been suckered into a pyramid scheme, and don't want to admit it. Every turn and phrase in their performance is really a parody of what a rock band is all about, yet they are selling it earnestly through a business model based on this confusion. Audiences tend to pay close attention and wander in, but it is unknown whether they are amazed by the musicianship, trying to grab the money Squelch's throws, or just offended by the absurd stage show.

Squelch's is the first band to embrace the Ridiculiste movement in art and music. They are not so much a band as a multi-level viral marketing business. Phase I of their model is currently underway, which involves giving away CDs and all the door money they make to the audience. In return, the listener becomes a Squelch's "product." Phase 2 will…

The band has taken this unique business to stages all over the DFW metroplex; playing at Club Clearview, Curtain Club, Dada, Liquid Lounge, Trees and the Wreck Room, in addition to a few failed attempts to bribe booking agents at said and other venues. They are being played on the radio in LA, San Diego and Austin, but have yet to get any play or ink from the Dallas media, because THIS SCENE IS A JOKE.

Their first fully produced CD, Love Is The Problem, comprises recordings that were a full year in the making. Though it cost many thousands of dollars to make, they are giving it out for free to anyone who shows up. Why?



Jason English

Maybe this town has dried out sitting on the shelf, the cork crumbling in my hands. I guess I could keep walking forever and it wouldn't change much, save for moments of revelation, stepping out into a square and marvelling at the monuments of the dead. These people haven't invented any words in a long time so it is about time to start creating our own vocabulary. When I see you I want to act like I don't exist. Look at them screaming about stocks and sex for the comfort of their own voices. Damn Americans of which I am.




Brian Miller

Can you hear me? I'm losing you. I think someone was trying to call me. Let me go outside. Wait. I'm entering a lead-lined room. Be our eye a in. Am I Elle; elle ear? Are I see age a hardy in the middle. Eye plague o' tar.




Greg Shows

I was born into ubiquity. When I was young I had to eat trite. We lived in a hackney down by the river. I started collecting cliches by the seashore in order to make ends meet. When there wasn't enough to go around we had to eat pablum. My father owned a boring factory. He often came home saying he bored all day. Thanks to his teaching I bore very easily. People say I'm an idiom, but I'm more superfluous than that.




Chris Smith

I am a mock star. Since I became a mocker nobody knows if I really like anything or not. Certain restrictions apply. Done by a professional on a closed course. Don't try this at home. Please stand by. In order of appearance, need not affiliate with any opinions other than my own. Avoid overexposure.